Too many women are unfairly labeled and accused of being too aggressive or difficult at work. That often inaccurate description not only holds them back from promotions but refocuses their attention away from their leadership and strategic thinking to trying to not be perceived as aggressive.
At the same time, aggressive men get ahead all time. Yet assertive women get penalized.
If you are a leader, have female staff, and want to be fair, you need to understand the difference between being aggressive and being assertive.
Aggressiveness is damaging for the long-term results and vision. Assertiveness is a highly desirable…
5 Way Assertiveness Will Make You Much Kinder
Many people think that assertiveness makes them selfish and rude jerks.
Contrary to popular belief, assertiveness does not limit how much kindness, generosity, and compassion you give out.
In fact, it enhances it. Assertiveness makes you a better person.
Here are 5 reasons why being more assertive actually makes you kinder.
When you are more assertive, you become less bitter, frustrated, and resentful of others. You are clear on what matters to you and are able to achieve the things you want in life. …
Have you ever gone into and come out of a working meeting completely silent? Are you often the person who speaks the least?
Do you find it challenging to speak up in meetings? Do you find it hard to express your opinions, views, and ideas?
I have seen meeting organizers deliberately remove regular participants from regular meetings and committees because they don’t speak up. Guidelines for efficient meetings usually suggest reducing the number of people in meetings. Who do you think meeting organizers will remove from the meeting list? The silent ones!
I’ve also seen people who were not…
Different job levels require different skills. However, most people who get promoted to a new level don’t understand the skills that will help them succeed in that new role.
One of the most difficult transitions happen from individual contributor to manager for a team where emphasis shifts from technical skills to people skills. A crucial people skill at all levels and particularly important for first-time and mid-level managers is assertive communication.
A crucial people skill at all levels and particularly important for first-time and mid-level managers is assertive communication.
Assertive communication skills are people skills for advocating for self, for…
When you proactively reach out to contact others, you’ll feel more confident, more connected, and even more powerful.
It allows for an exchange of value. You can facilitate the exchange by sharing the value map. Learn about others, add value to them, and show them how they can add value back to you if they wish to do so.
Connect to facilidate the exchange of value: learn about others, add value to them, and show them how they can add value back to you if…
To thrive in a new culture, immigrants must choose the advice they get carefully, proactivelly reach out to the right people, ask for help when needed, be their own best advocate, and be open to negative feedback.
Immigrating to a new country can be overwhelming, lonely, and stressful. That is why it is essential to get the right people to support you, to be adaptable, and take command over your experience.
I interviewed Henri Nkuepo, international lawyer and author of “New Immigrant Playbook — Strategies for Success in Your New Country” about how immigrants can find success faster and…
To succeed as a woman in a male-dominated industry you need to make yourself heard in meetings by building one-on-one rapport and to capture their attention by creating stronger transitions to your perspectives with questions, “and” transitions, paraphrasing, and by restating the problem.
How do you succeed as a woman in a male-dominated workplace?
One of the top challenges women face working in a male-dominated work environments is making themselves heard in meetings.
Being smart, having confidence about your views and abilities, and speaking up decisively in meetings are not enough to be heard in meetings when you are…
Nice agreeable leaders get fewer resources but more work, they are less effective, they struggle to manage their team, and limit their hiring pool.
The first time I managed a team, I struggled with my passive personality.
My new team had gone through several managers in the previous 2 years who did not improve their work conditions. They were frustrated with the constant changes, skeptical of my ability, and suspicious about my agenda.
A team member constantly complained about me, the company, and her work. At one point, she explicitly refused to work on what I had asked while…
Obsessive rumination is easier to stop when you shift your focus away from how other people react to you and towards positive future-oriented activities that will improve your life and career, such as your goals, your plans, and your actions and towards serving others.
Do you get stuck ruminating over how you should have reacted, what you could have said, or how limited you think you are? Rumination is the enemy of confidence, action-taking, and productivity.
When you don’t deal with rumination, you waste your precious time and energy on limiting thoughts, you deplete your courage, and increase your…
For a powerful compliment, show the positive impact of what they did on yourself and others, measurable performance, an aspect of their personality, a positive behavior, or a useful process used.
Compliments have the power to connect, build trust, motivate, change behaviors, and teach.
If you are the kind of person who says “well done” or “great job,” congrats for being the kind of person who spreads positivity and demonstrates good leadership qualities!
However, there are better ways to give impactful compliments and positive feedback.
The problem is that “great job” and “well done” are vague, express judgement, and…